People all over the world feel hope and despair in daily life. Hopes and dreams are what people imagine. They do not have to look for perfection in life. If people set their goals too high, they will experience an endless journey trying to fulfill their wishes. Hence, people need to know their own capacity in order to set goals. People only live once, so people should be hopeful while taking having fun and meaningful lives as a priority. However, people can feel despair more easily than hope. Each person has different causes, but stressful modern societies have common factors such as shallow relationships, poor working environments, and financial insecurity. Unraveling the factors that cause people to have hope and lose hope are important.
Factors that Create Hope and Despair
Hope is having good future prospects, whereas despair feels like being isolated from the world and abandoned socially. According to Dr. Tali Sharot, a scientist researching people’s feelings of optimism, emotion, and decision-making, “Hope is what we want to happen” (Westerman, 2017). Strong feelings make them positive and always produce good things.
People often learn from failure. People deeply reflect on failures, understand what is missing, and increase their strength and breadth. In short, learning from failure is a factor in success. Looking at the life of a person who did the things, it seems to be a series of hardships, something that they cannot imitate very well, whereas they may have enjoyed the hardship somewhere, seeking glory and joy beyond it. Thus, confidence, joy, and strength are born because people endure pain. People who believe in the future and work hard with hope will always be given everything. On the other hand, despair is a situation where people feel that people are at the bottom of their lives. Dr. Tali Sharot says that if a person has a lot of negative experiences, they will believe that negative things will continue. If people feel despair, they may interpret everything badly. Sometimes, small mistakes and bad experiences turn into despair, and people are trapped in their shells. It is hard to open up and have time, so they feel envious and jealous of others in despair. When people feel despair, people are just reacting to some fact because it is also people who create despair, and the triggers are different. Despair comes when their heart hurts and rejects reality. However, if people have created despair, naturally, it is possible to get over themselves. As a result, eliminating despair from their thoughts makes it harder to get caught up in despair and keep distance from despair, and people who have hope can keep motivation and procrastination too.
The Difference between Feeling Hope and Despair
People who live in developing countries and modern countries both experience mental problems as a result of trauma and negative experiences, such as abuse. In developing countries, refugees such as the Rohingya live in unsanitary and harsh environments, so they cannot afford to think about the future and do their best to live. As mentioned by Westerman, Pindie Stephen, an employee at the Organization for Migration (IOM) suggested, “It’s hard for people to think about the future when they’re concerned about immediate needs identity papers, school for their children, and safe housing” (Westerman, 2017).
Children who see their parents hurt or killed may develop depression and PTSD. Moreover, innocent civilians, who experience conflict, betrayal, and lies and are caught in disputes between nations, have no hope. However, it is not only in developing countries that negative experiences impact hope. (Kambayashi, 2017) describes a similar loss of hope among Japanese people in his article “In Japan, Young Women’s Problems Are Often Ignored. But She’s Ready to Help”. In Japan, many working women struggle with relationships with their bosses and colleagues. If they work overtime with them, they can easily have mental problems. This is because women often use group psychology, even if they are worried, they feel that they have no ally, so there are cases where women who have mental problems hold themselves alone without consulting people. Women’s social advancement is increasing, but the fact is that Japanese society is still mainly male. This is because the idea that men work outside, and women protect their homes still has a strong influence on society. Many Japanese men also feel pressure, usually from their fathers, to join a large famous company and find a stable career after they graduate from university. For women, according to Jun Tachibana, who helps troubled young women in Japan, “Some mothers have severe demands on their daughters, and their daughters are hurt to their self-esteem.” Parents’ expectations can hurt the hearts of their children. Therefore, these negative actions might lead to mental problems.
Prepared to Accept Despair
Having despair is one event in life, but experiencing it does not always have bad consequences. Westerman and Kambayashi both argue that people are losing hope in their daily lives from negative experiences and mental problems, but people around them might provide mental care and solve problems. (Kambayashi, 2017). This shows that there is a big difference between the girls who arrive at Bond Project and when they leave. Tachibana thinks, “Even if they are in trouble once again, they now can go to the right person and ask the right question” (Kambayashi, 2017). Fixing these problems is sometimes easier said than done, and people cannot help themselves unless they are motivated to do so. It is essential not to drag up the past to have hope. No matter how much regret people have, there is no way back. If people have time to worry, they should make a positive plan for hope. When people have hope, they do not forget to show their identity without being too concerned about the eyes of others. In despair, people tend to choose death to avoid the painful reality. It could certainly be an easy way, but choosing death is no solution. If they choose “death” and recommence their lives, issues that could not be solved in this life will be carried over to the next life. That means that what they have avoided so far piles up and creates despair. If they do not accept despair, they cannot escape from it.
Despair for Growth
Most important is the will to overcome despair. However, if they cannot believe that despair will be overcome, whatever they do will not work. In fact, despair in life has not only bad aspects but also good aspects. Despair can make a big difference in people’s lives. The purpose of human life is to grow through various events. Despair may be one of the ways to grow more as a person.
Conclusion
Despair and hope are two sides of the same coin. When hope disappears and becomes despair, people have to have strong willpower because if they believe in themselves, they will get some results. Whether people turn to hope or despair depends on their own efforts. However, people who are in desperate situations should stay strong and not give up hope. Therefore, only people who have hope can be rewarded by hope. Those who have experienced negative life events and mental issues may hesitate to have more hope than others, but their situation will not change unless they have the will to seek hope. Above all, other people who can reach out just need to help them before they lose hope.
# References
Westerman, A. (2017). CommonLit | Can You Still Have Hope When Life Seems Hopeless? [online] CommonLit. Available at: https://www.commonlit.org/en/texts/can-you-still-have-hope-when-life-seems-hopeless [Accessed 7 June 2022].
Takehiko Kambayashi, Christian Science Monitor. (2017). In Japan, young women’s problems are often ignored. But she’s ready to help. [online] Available at: https://www.csmonitor.com/World/Making-a-difference/2017/0309/In-Japan-young-women-s-problems-are-often-ignored.-But-she-s-ready-to-help [Accessed 7 June 2022].
